Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The Snooze Factor

*Yawn*
Lately, and I use the term lately lightly, I'm always late.
Does that make sense?
I'm one of those people with a necessity for 8 hours sleep. I just don't function with less. And yet, I rarely get more than 6 or 7. Ritually, each morning I stagger out of bed.
Case in point: Must be at work by 8:45 a.m each morning.
Typical morning:
(alarm set for 7:05 a.m)
Alarm sounds at 7:05. Radio comes on. If it's a good song, listen till the end -hit snooze. If announcer speaking-hit snooze right away.
7:15 am. Alarm sounds again. Don't care what's on. Hit snooze.
7:25 am. Alarm sounds. It's contest time. DJ announces a listener's name to call in. Listen for name. Name called. Not mine. Hit snooze.
7:35 am. Alarm sounds. Irritated. Alarm annoying. Hit snooze.
7:45 am. Alarm sounds. Fling off covers in a mad dash to get to shower. Turn shower on. Step into shower while still cold. *Profanity*
From that moment on I'm completely frenzied, (although I always make time for the usual analytical face gaze 3 inches from mirror). Dry my hair, paint my face, shellac my hair, decide on clothing and commence with morning ceremonial sock rummaging.
8:20 am. Stand in kitchen wondering why I didn't make a lunch last night. Look at clock. *Profanity*
8:30 am. In line at Tim Hortons drive thru. Line long. People slow. *Profanity*
8:40 am. Slip in a Yanni CD. Enjoy my 5 minute dash to work.
8:47 am. Promenade through front door of office faking the relaxed and refreshed look.
8:48 am. A few jovial 'Good Morning's'.
2:00 p.m Head on keyboard.

Perhaps this is my solution?
Say hello to Mr. Clock Radio.
As if a regular alarm isn't annoying enough,
this creepy looking clock radio has a robotic head that will wake up to 30-odd different voices ranging from gentle to a screaming maniac. You can also get it to tell you your fortune and wink as you undress.

On second thought.... I think not.

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